Brooke Winkler
President/Founder
For those of you who don’t know me, my name is Brooke, Adeline is my beautiful angel. I am also a mom to Eriksen and Ellisen…and a wife to my husband Thad.
Iowa is my home state and that’s the way it will always be. I am a huge Cubs fan and enjoy playing ball with my son Eriksen and soon Ellisen will join in. I love crafting and building things, it is very therapeutic for me.
I had heard about miscarriages and stillbirths but its definitely not something that crosses your mind when you see those two blue lines. At 17+5, I was told I PPROM’d (Preterm Premature Rupture of Membranes) with Adeline. The next 24 hours determined that she was a fighter. Sadly, 2 weeks later at 19+5, I was told the news that no mother wants to hear…..”there’s no heartbeat”
What do you do after that? Who could I relate to?
Once word got out, people were coming forward with their experiences. I saw that I wasn’t alone. With pregnancy and infant loss it seems like it’s so taboo to talk about it.
But why? Why can’t we speak out and talk about our child(ren)? How can I change this?
After talking with a classmate of mine, we thought it would be good for women who experience this to have a safe place to go. Then it snowballed into helping other families. So Mothers of Angel Babies was born.
The story of my angels is always very hard to bring up or talk about but here it is.
June 24 2008 I lost my first angel due to preeclampsia. I was rushed into the Clinton hospital were I began bleeding at 32 weeks along. When they checked for Eldon heartbeat he had already passed and I was loosing alot of blood and was flown to Iowa city to give birth. After 3 blood transfusions and giving birth to my child that I had known had passed, it killed me. I chose not to try to deal with it and took the wrong path.
After 3 months I found out I was pregnant again. With my daughter Adalynn. She had saved me from a life going in the wrong direction. I made it full term and I had her with hardly any problems, a beautiful 9 lb 3 oz baby girl that is now 11.
I found out in March of this year I was pregnant again after trying for 2 years! We were beyond excited. Everything was going well. We were due to have our beautiful baby girl on November 7 2020. On September 5 2020 we went to our wonderful niece wedding. Got home. I got everything ready for my baby shower for the next day. That night September 5. I said goodbye to my sister went to walk in my house and looked down i was bleeding. I waved my sister down and prayed to God this wouldn’t happen to me again. I was 31 weeks along. Rushed by ambulance to Davenport. They had a heartbeat. I was rushed to Iowa city. They did an emergency c section. My Olivia was born without a heartbeat. They brought her back. Born on September 6. When I finally came to after 9 blood transfusions. I was able to see her. We all thought she was fine just a few complications. We soon found out she had stage 4 bleeding on the brain and she was shutting down. She put up a fight and tried. Then it all came rushing back. On September 16 2020 she had passed. I had lost my 2nd child.
It’s never easy loosing a child. I’m extremely lucky to have an amazing support system. But there’s not a day that goes bye you don’t ask why? Or how could this happen to me twice? I’m very happy to be apart of this non-profit. You don’t realize how many have gone threw the horror of loosing an angel.
Jackie Randall
Secretary
Sonia Miller
Treasurer
My name is Sonia and I love to fish. I have been married to the love of my life for 32 years. I love my animals, spending time at my cabin, and like sleeping in.
I am so proud of the founder of Mothers of Angel Babies founder, she is my daughter.
We were lucky enough to get her after I lost my Angel Baby. I had an ectopic pregnancy which is where pregnancy occurs outside of the uterus.
We are now the fortunate grandparents of a boy and girl and an Angel Baby girl. My life is complete and I love being with this wonderful group of mothers.
Christmas Eve 2017 I took a home pregnancy test and it was positive. I went to my doctor who confirmed what we were hoping; my husband and I were excepting our first child! I’ve never known such joy, I could almost burst.
Around week six, a few irregularities had me nervous, but an ultrasound confirmed a heartbeat and we got baby’s first picture. I’ve never loved a picture so much. A week later my world came crashing down around me. The bleeding that had started a week earlier was heavier and unending. My head knew what was happening, but my heart wouldn’t accept it. We went to the doctor for another ultrasound, and I heard a sentence I’ll never forget.
“Unfortunately, I no longer detect a heartbeat.”
I had had a miscarriage. Something I hadn’t even thought possible. Miscarriage was something that happened to other people, not to me. The physical pain was nothing compared to how my heart was breaking. I had conversations with God asking, “Why me? Why my baby?”
It wasn’t until I’d had a miscarriage that I realized how common this loss is. 1 in 4 women will experience a miscarriage. And yet, no one talks about it, as if it is wrong to admit this happened to you. What I love about Mothers of Angel Babies is it gives grieving mothers a place to talk openly about their loss, but it also is an opportunity for us to educate the community about something that impacts more lives than you probably realize.
I am 1 in 4. I am also the mother to two children, one in Heaven and one here on Earth. I am more than this experience, but it will always be apart of me. And I will be stronger because of it.
Justine Paradiso
Director